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Be in a Triad - Don't be Fake...

It seems like every over line out of my son's mouth these days is "hey man, don't be fake". At first, as it is with half of the things he says, I had no clue what he meant. This is where urban slang dictionaries are handy. In essence, what he is attempting to say, is that a person should not act in a way that is hypocritical. Yet, his perspective on what is appropriate behavior for others is often very different from what he deems to be appropriate behavior for himself. It leaves me wondering, who is the fake one really!?

As it relates to the church and the spiritual journey, I am pretty sure that being fake is not highly valued. From the worlds perspective, the church is full of hypocrites. And who knows, maybe you share the sentiment. One of the reasons the church has struggled with "being fake" is due to our preoccupation with 3 key relationships: knowing God, loving others, and serving the world. While these are all helpful relationships to navigate, there remains one key relationship that often left to chance - ones relationship to oneself. Without navigating this relationship, our "emotional health" can remain underdeveloped while our "spiritual health" seems to soar. In time the juxtaposition of these realities will cause us to act out in ways that seem inconsistent with the Gospel, healthy relational patterns, and self giving motives. 

In short, we become "fake".

Triads are meant to help close this gap. By allowing yourself to be open and vulnerable to several trusted people who are committed to speaking the truth in love, we create a context for God to transform our lives in places and in ways that we would never had known needed addressing. These groups help us see not only ourselves more clearly, but they also help us to see the world more clearly.

We are convinced as a church that the change we long to see in the world is rooted in our own existential need and desire for change within ourselves. Triads are one way that we are attempting to initiate change in us so that we can be the change we long to see in the world. Yet, this will not come about without patience, grace, and a commitment to people in their blindness and brokenness. This is love. The real kind.

Don't be fake,
Angel